Just a friendly tickle from Cobaea scandens. Teucrium fruticans azureum has nothing whatsoever to worry about, nor does the solanum or ballota. Helleborus lividus can rest easy.
Cobaea: Rumors of my expansionism are greatly exaggerated. That’s allegedly 30 feet. That New Zealanders consider me a noxious weed only attests to their alarmist tendencies. Along with their
nuclear-free zone, they’d apparently like a cobaea-free zone as well. The nerve of those kiwis! My friends, who I count many in number, call me Mexican Ivy, Cathedral Bells, Monastery Bells,
Cup and Saucer Vine. I am beloved. Cathedral walls, chain link fence, makes no difference to me. I’ll cover them all!
Teucrium: Yes, of course you will. But, excuse me, can you shift to the left a bit? There, that’s it. Ah, that sun does feels good where you’ve been leaning in a bit heavily. Coming from the Mediterranean,
I am an avowed sun worshipper, you know, along with my pale friend ballota.
Ballota: I think we’re getting along beautifully!
Teucrium: As do I! I’m not blaming anyone. It’s just she’s done it again, sandwiching us in and leaving it to us to sort it out.
And, no offense, Cobaea, but I don’t think that 5-foot tripod is adequate to contain your…ahem…enthusiasm.
Cobaea: Nonsense! I certainly know how to behave. Why I take exception to…
Hellebore: Say! What part of the Mediterranean do you come from? Ever been to Corsica?
Solanum: (gasping) I can’t…breathe…
Cobaea: Oh, my sincere apologies. How’s that? Better?
Solanum: (weakly) Yes, much, thank you.
Cobaea: Okay, everyone. Cheese it! Here she comes with those clippers again.
